I sometimes get so frustrated with myself. I do the same wrong things time after time, even though I don’t want to. What’s wrong with me? Can’t I just stick to my decisions, my best of intentions?
Reading St. Paul’s letter to the Romans I have some great company in this, “For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do – this I keep on doing.” Romans 7:19
Was Paul judging people, being angry in his own lack of compassion? We don’t know, but we do know that it frustrated him. He even asked God to take it away. He realised his sinful nature and in verse 25 said “thanks be to God, who delivers me though Jesus Christ our Lord!”
Yes, we need to recognize our sinful nature, but like Paul, realise it is Jesus Christ who has Saved us, and redeemed us. We need to also forgive ourselves (not just our neighbour) seventy times seven – lots of times, actually every time, for Christ does.
If we are not careful, we give up being good, trying to be considerate, kind, generous, loving, forgiving etc because it is too hard.
We have failed so many times. We seem to fall back into our old ways. We don’t do things well or not at all. Our selfishness creeps in. We think our opinion is so important and people are so annoying at times.
We can allow the negative voices to be stronger than the positive voices.
We don’t listen to our conscience anymore all because failure hurts.
Failure can make us feel second-rate, but Jesus does not think that of us. He tells us to forgive and start again. Afresh. Anew. For in Him that is the next step after a mistake, an error, a sin.
It is Lent so repent, turn towards change and move forward for in Him we are a new creation. And if we have to do that 70×7 times then so be it. He is always there beside us, loving us, calling us back to Him.
PRAYER: Lord, here I am. This is me in all my imperfections and I need you today. Forgive me for the times I do the wrong thing even though I know the right thing to do. Help me to forgive and forgive and forgive again as you do because it is in you Lord Jesus that all things are made new. Amen.